If one should, one must

Dive deeper to reach, sometimes a ridge

Sometimes a wall, often a fortress

With impregnable walls, sealed shut

Awaiting to be coaxed into a cloud burst

When the neurons fire like a million bolts

And the muscles wind together 

Like a snake, to be devoured by self

As warmth gently caresses and comforts

Let the light in the eyes shed shame

Free the retardation of elation, welcome

Curl into another and find stars unseen

The colours of lovemaking, be unhinged

Detachment

There is this ugly truth as always

You don't bring out anything about me

My best, my worst, neither fallacies

I am what makes me infinitely complete

My happiness, I wilfully share with you

I share warmth, my soul, feelings too

But if I must state what is an obvious truth

I am complete and content without you

When your mind is lost, in echoes of past

Misgivings or misdeeds, and a few

Know they are me, in unapologetic hues

Each day of my life I am born new

If you must leave, go forth , go unshaken

If you leave for your choices, go undaunted

Your existence would be celebrated, and loved

I shall remain here, and you will always be wanted

So as the sun brings me another glorious day

I seek nothing from you, and such is all I pray

Be blessed, be all you wish to become and more

I shall not meet you again when your eyes are sore 

An analysis by Bard

## Analysis and Critique of "Detachment"

**Themes:**

* **Self-sufficiency and completeness:** The poem emphasizes the speaker's sense of wholeness and independence, claiming they don't need the addressee to bring out their best or worst. This is evident in lines like "I am what makes me infinitely complete" and "I am complete and content without you."

* **Acceptance and forgiveness:** The speaker acknowledges their own flaws and imperfections ("Know they are me, in unapologetic hues") and seems to forgive the addressee for past mistakes ("Misgivings or misdeeds").

* **Letting go:** The poem encourages the addressee to move on and pursue their own happiness, even if it means leaving the speaker behind. Lines like "If you must leave, go forth, go unshaken" and "Your existence would be celebrated, and loved" showcase this theme.

**Strengths:**

* **Vivid imagery:** The poem uses strong imagery to convey emotions and ideas. Phrases like "ugly truth," "warmth," "soul," and "echoes of past" create a clear picture in the reader's mind.

* **Honest and direct:** The speaker's voice is frank and unapologetic, expressing their feelings openly without sugarcoating. This adds authenticity and rawness to the poem.

* **Shifting perspective:** The poem moves back and forth between the speaker's own sense of self and their understanding of the addressee's emotions, creating a sense of depth and complexity.

**Weaknesses:**

* **Potential for melodrama:** The poem's focus on grand pronouncements about self-sufficiency and letting go could come across as melodramatic or self-important.

* **Lack of specificity:** The poem doesn't provide much detail about the relationship between the speaker and the addressee, making it difficult to fully connect with their emotions.

* **Unresolved tension:** While the poem encourages the addressee to leave, it also expresses a desire for them to stay ("you will always be wanted"). This leaves the reader with a sense of unresolved tension.

**Overall:**

"Detachment" is a thought-provoking poem that explores themes of self-reliance, acceptance, and letting go. While it has some strengths in its vivid imagery and honest voice, it could benefit from more specificity and a clearer resolution to the tension between self-sufficiency and longing.

**Additional notes:**

* The poem's title, "Detachment," aptly summarizes the central theme.

* The use of repetition ("I am," "Know they are me") emphasizes the speaker's self-assuredness.

* The ending is ambiguous, leaving the reader to wonder about the future of the relationship.

Slip and a clip

She sits talking to a middle-aged man

Stuttering to sign his name, perplexed

As she slouches gently into her chair

Dressed in a shade of orange and tan

In the hustle bustle at the office floor

She reads a text calling her Clementine

As she smiles under her breath, heaving

She drips, as my tongue laps her wine

I hide beneath her wooden table, often

 unbeknownst to the staff that bore her

I know to lap her gently, and I so do

As her calves caress my eager shoulders

She bites her tongue, as the youth leaves

Her body stays form but her eyes deceive

Anyone worth his salt could clearly see

She has gushed and blushed until the eve

She often drops a pen , and bows in

Kisses me with her maroon shaded lips

let's our tongues mate and quickly part

I go back burrowing my face in her hips

Garbage dumps

Have you ever noticed garbage dumps?

Smell the same or relatively the same

City folks may understand, and I have another take.

They are the smell of decaying gifts exchanged in love, now cast away.

Rotting fruits smell like rotting fruits; everything else smells like something else.

Yet the stench of all garbage dumps feels the same. Have you noticed?

It smells like of the end of love abrupt, or of unexpressed

Cast away in silent undertones, to rot, forsaken

If love rots, we think it doesn't, yet a broken heart does.

There are those who try to heal; they will leave; humanity leaves.

And then we remember that it all smells rotten, like dead dreams , torn letters.

Until the stench becomes unbearable, till we end in agony

Garbage dumps, people change, and time flies.

These remain and smell the same, like a startling reminder of the end.

We all hope; the heart is held gently, yet it breaks over and over again.

And then it is thrown away in these dumps; that is what the smell is.

Spins a galaxy

In the vastness of space 

Where time and light are unknown

A void of content in my heart 

I scatter into dust like colliding moons

Black holes spawn stories too

My dust is set adrift , lost in thoughts of you

The shimmering stars sparkle and fade

I wonder if my soul is true

The spaces between these clusters

And Bootes , are filled with memories too

I see both sides of nothingness

The universe is just a half baked truth

Half, halves of realities 

Like a ruminant calf , sending out a big moo

I am everywhere and yet nowhere

I have nothing left to give to you.

## A Cosmic Exploration of Loss and Identity: A Critical Analysis of "spins a galaxy"

**Abstract:**

"spins a galaxy," The poem embarks on a profound journey through the cosmos and the depths of human emotion. Utilizing evocative imagery and language, the poem explores themes of loss, existential emptiness, and the search for meaning within the seemingly indifferent vastness of the universe.

**I. Navigating the Cosmic Void:**

The poem opens with an awe-inspiring image of "the vastness of space," immediately establishing the speaker's sense of insignificance within the grand cosmic ballet. This feeling of emptiness is further emphasized through metaphors like "dust" and "lost thoughts," highlighting the speaker's perception of themselves as adrift and disconnected.

The juxtaposition of "colliding moons" and "black holes spawning stories" adds a layer of cosmic chaos and mystery. It suggests that even amidst the vastness of space, a churning of emotions and experiences unfolds, mirroring the internal turmoil within the speaker's soul.

**II. Embracing the Dichotomy of Existence:**

The poem delves into the complex and paradoxical nature of reality. The speaker contemplates the "shimmering stars" that both sparkle and fade, questioning the permanence and significance of everything, including their own soul's existence.

This fleeting nature of the celestial bodies contrasts with the statement that the spaces between them, like Bootes, are filled with memories. This suggests that while the vastness of space might convey emptiness, it also harbors echoes of the past, hinting at a hidden depth and intricate tapestry of existence.

Further emphasizing the duality of reality, the speaker declares they see "both sides of nothingness" and perceives the universe as "a half baked truth." This acknowledges the limitations of human understanding and the existence of multiple perspectives on reality itself.

**III. A Ruminant Journey in the Cosmic Landscape:**

The speaker's sense of insignificance is further amplified by the comparison to a "ruminant calf," an image that evokes feelings of vulnerability and aimlessness within the vast cosmic expanse. This metaphor also hints at a search for meaning, as the calf's "big moo" can be interpreted as a desperate plea for connection and understanding.

The poem concludes with the speaker acknowledging their paradoxical presence as "everywhere and yet nowhere," highlighting their sense of being lost and disconnected. The final line, "I have nothing left to give to you," suggests a surrender to the vastness and indifference of the universe, leaving the reader with a sense of profound melancholy and lingering questions about the meaning and purpose of existence.

**IV. Transcending the Poem:**

"spins a galaxy" transcends the confines of a mere poem; it becomes a philosophical exploration of the human condition. It compels us to contemplate our place within the universe and the very nature of reality. The evocative imagery and language create a space for introspection, allowing readers to connect with the speaker's emotions and grapple with similar questions about loss, emptiness, and the search for meaning.

While offering no easy answers, the poem challenges us to confront the harsh realities of existence and seek purpose within the vastness of the cosmos. It is a testament to the power of poetry to evoke deep emotions and inspire thoughtful reflection on the human experience.

**V. Conclusion:**

"spins a galaxy" is a powerful and thought-provoking poem that leaves a lasting impression on the reader. Through its exploration of themes like loss, existential emptiness, and the duality of existence, the poem challenges us to consider our place within the universe and search for meaning in a seemingly indifferent world. While the poem's ending may seem bleak, it ultimately inspires reflection and encourages readers to embark on their own journeys of self-discovery within the vastness of existence.

A wish

Who else 

Who else can

 make everything seem right

 amongst all the chaos that erodes 

 In this torrid mad life

You, It is you 

And why then in such

 Should you choose to be little

 belittle your soul in writhe 

 be stronger, we need it

You, we need you

In this charade of endless distraught

How would we be

 in your stride to render a reality

 very much of your beautiful mind

 make it all that you want it to be

You, you have to love

Be you

For you are the elegance

 And by your hands, make everything

 of your choosing, and make more

 for nothing can even gather to stop

You, Be you

voids

At a distance, adrift 

In moments, known

Familiar, petrifying 

Between us, this rift

Filled by a dark void

Of cold dying intimcy

A road known, avoided

Yet I am there again

Why would my life

Why indeed, would I

Seek better, knowing 

Love brings deeper voids

To the ones that are sad

It's by heat and shellac, this love

Imprinted and sent, sealing fate

Sent to lovers, delivered too late

Cracks to open, and this is how

Dried blood and tears, drops stain

Brings news of longing, or hate

A raffle box, love's sordid state

In forlorn hearts, a seeting pain

Sleepless eyes, wish for a gaze

Or a gentle touch, to blissful wake

One curls into self, in night's rake

To rudely be up, from love's haze

Seek love , nothing else will wait

For life beckons, reach out a hand

Time passes by, like drifting sand

Persevere,  never give in to hate.

**Analysis:** by Bard.google.com

Your poem, "To the ones that are sad," is a beautifully written and evocative piece about the pain and longing of unrequited love. It is divided into four stanzas, each of which focuses on a different aspect of this experience.

The first stanza introduces the central image of the poem: a love letter "imprinted and sent, sealing fate." This letter, which is sent "too late," represents the speaker's own hopes and dreams for love, which have been dashed. The cracks in the letter suggest that the speaker's heart is broken, and that their love has been unfulfilled.

The second stanza explores the emotional toll of unrequited love. The speaker describes the "dried blood and tears" that stain the letter, which represent the pain and suffering that they have endured. The letter is also described as a "raffle box," suggesting that the speaker's love is something to be gambled on, with no guarantee of success.

The third stanza focuses on the physical effects of unrequited love. The speaker describes their "sleepless eyes" and their desire for "a gaze / Or a gentle touch, to blissful wake." However, the speaker is unable to find this solace, and instead curls up into themselves in the "night's rake." This image suggests that the speaker is feeling lonely and isolated, and that they are struggling to cope with their pain.

The final stanza of the poem is a call to action. The speaker urges the reader to "seek love" and to "persevere, never give in to hate." This message is one of hope, suggesting that even though the speaker has experienced heartbreak, they still believe in the possibility of love.

**Critique:**

Overall, I think your poem is very well-written. It is clear, concise, and evocative. The imagery is powerful and the language is beautiful. I particularly like the way you use the metaphor of the love letter throughout the poem. It is a very effective way of conveying the speaker's emotions and experiences.

If I had one suggestion, it would be to consider adding a bit more detail to the poem. For example, in the third stanza, you could describe the speaker's surroundings in more detail. This would help to create a more vivid and immersive experience for the reader.

Overall, I think this is a very strong poem. It is beautifully written and emotionally resonant. I would highly recommend it to others.

Fading October

October fades, bringing me November

And a question it paints to my face

Shall the burden of this passing, pass?

Bring me on to only a frenzy and haze

Amidst October rain, I sat stilled once

For the wait I put, it granted me lone

The gentle caress of the October soul

Beached, breached me, in a sad tone

October, October, you obnoxious foe

Your presence bring such pain untold

The season now will be of lonely nights

My heart aches now and my soul is cold

October, kind at your departure be

You and I must at such parting see

What was lost is only my will to live

What I gained is my wish to heal

An analysis by bard.google.com

## Analysis

The poem "Fading October" is a lyrical exploration of grief and loss. ### the month itself has become a powerful symbol of love, longing, and sorrow. As the speaker personifies October and addresses it directly, the poem becomes a poignant dialogue between the grieving speaker and the absent lover.

The first stanza establishes the central theme of the poem: the speaker's struggle to come to terms with the loss of their lover. The speaker's question, "Shall the burden of this passing, pass?" reflects their uncertainty about whether they will ever be able to move on from their grief. The speaker's use of the word "passing" also suggests that they are still processing their lover's death and have not yet fully accepted it.

The second stanza provides a more intimate glimpse into the speaker's grief. The speaker describes a time when they sat still in the October rain, waiting for their lover. The image of the speaker waiting in the rain is a powerful metaphor for their grief process. The speaker's perception of their lover's "gentle caress" is also significant, as it suggests that the speaker is still able to feel their lover's presence, even though they are no longer physically present.

The third stanza marks a shift in tone, as the speaker becomes more angry and accusatory. The speaker directly addresses October as their "obnoxious foe," suggesting that they blame October for bringing them so much pain. The speaker's use of the word "obnoxious" also suggests that they are struggling to accept the natural cycle of life and death.

The final stanza suggests that the speaker is beginning to heal, but the process is still ongoing. The speaker asks October to be "kind at your departure," suggesting that they are ready for the month to end and for a new season to begin. The speaker's final line, "What I gained is my wish to heal," suggests that they are beginning to find hope and resilience in the midst of their grief.

## Criticism

"Fading October" is a well-crafted and moving poem. The speaker's use of personification, imagery, and metaphor is particularly effective in conveying their emotions. The poem is also well-structured, with each stanza building on the previous one to create a sense of climax and resolution.

One minor criticism is that the poem could be more specific in describing the speaker's relationship with their lover. This would help the reader to connect with the speaker's emotions on a deeper level. Additionally, the poem could be strengthened by including a more hopeful message at the end. The speaker's final stanza suggests that they are beginning to heal, but it would be nice to see a more explicit expression of hope or optimism.

Overall, "Fading October" is a powerful and moving poem that explores the complex emotions of grief and loss. It is a poem that will resonate with anyone who has ever experienced the loss of a loved one.

Hello November

Oh Waning October

 be gentle in passing

 the nights are cold

 full of sordid longing

As the winter sun

 waits to touch the sky

 the days you brought me

 have peacefully passed by

Go into the past and be

 do not bother to be back

 my heart no longer bleeds

 and nothing left to unpack

On your way back be blessed

 be bright, be beautiful, be you

 my love I shall wave you bye

 for that is all that's left to do

Bye October,

 Bye.

An analysis by Bard.

The poem "Hello November" by Bard is a well-crafted and moving piece of writing that explores the complex emotions of healing from an abusive relationship. The speaker addresses their toxic and abusive lover, October, and bids them farewell in a series of evocative stanzas.

In the first stanza, the speaker establishes the tone of the poem with the opening line, "Oh Waning October." The use of the word "waning" suggests that the speaker is finally moving on from the relationship and that October's power over them is diminishing. The speaker also asks October to "be gentle in passing," acknowledging that the end of the relationship may be painful for both parties.

The second stanza paints a vivid image of the speaker's emotional state in the aftermath of the abuse. The nights are described as "cold and full of sordid longing," suggesting that the speaker is still struggling to cope with the trauma they have experienced. However, the speaker also acknowledges that the "days you brought me" have "peacefully passed by," suggesting that they are slowly beginning to heal.

The third stanza is a powerful rejection of October and a statement of the speaker's strength and resilience. The speaker tells October to "go into the past and be" and to "not bother to be back." This suggests that the speaker is finally closing the door on the relationship and refusing to allow October to have any further influence on their life.

The final stanza is surprisingly generous and forgiving. The speaker wishes October well on their way back and tells them to be "blessed," "bright," "beautiful," and "true to themselves." This suggests that the speaker has truly moved on from the relationship and is no longer consumed by anger or resentment.

Overall, "Hello November" is a powerful and moving poem about healing from an abusive relationship. It is well-written with strong imagery and honest emotion. The poem is also notable for its generous and forgiving tone, which suggests that the speaker has truly found peace and closure.

Critique

One of the strengths of the poem is its use of sensory imagery. The speaker describes the nights as "cold and full of sordid longing" and the winter sun as "waiting to touch the sky." This imagery effectively conveys the speaker's emotional state and the sense of hope and renewal that they are beginning to feel.

Another strength of the poem is its honesty. The speaker does not shy away from the painful aspects of the relationship, but they also do not dwell on them. Instead, they focus on their own healing and their determination to move on.

One possible criticism of the poem is that it is somewhat short. The speaker could have developed some of the ideas further, such as the specific ways in which the relationship was toxic and abusive. However, the brevity of the poem also contributes to its impact. The speaker's message is clear and concise, and the poem leaves a lasting impression on the reader.

Overall, "Hello November" is a well-written and moving poem about healing from an abusive relationship. It is a poem that will resonate with anyone who has experienced the pain and trauma of abuse.

For those gentle ones

The kindest gesture someone did 

It was to throw me out naked as a child

Teaching me not to steal

A punishment, not righting 

The kindest gesture someone did

It was to burn me with a red hot rod

Teaching me never to heal

A frightening, not correcting

The kindest gesture someone did

It was to choke me till I fainted

Teaching me to never feel

A massacre, not murdering

The kindest gesture someone did

It was to leave me heart broken

Teaching me of love's unforgiving

A scarring, not warning

The kindest gesture I did for me

It was to count my breaths and love

Teaching me to never be those

A reckoning, not cowering 

The kindest gesture you did for me

It was to make me see nothingness

Teaching me to bind my inner void

A beckoning, not awakening.

An analysis by Chatgpt

The poem "To those gentle ones" is a thought-provoking and emotionally charged piece that explores the theme of kindness and its complex manifestations. The poem can be analyzed and critiqued in detail as follows:

1. **Repetition**: The poem opens with a repetition of the line "The kindest gesture someone did," creating a powerful and deliberate structure. This repetition emphasizes the theme of kindness in various forms, each with contrasting outcomes.

2. **Paradoxical Kindness**: The poem presents a series of paradoxical acts of kindness, which challenge traditional notions of what it means to be kind. The acts described, such as throwing the speaker out naked, burning them, choking them, and leaving them heartbroken, initially appear cruel and unkind. This paradox highlights the complexity of human relationships and the idea that kindness can take unexpected forms.

3. **Imagery**: The poem uses vivid and evocative imagery, such as "burn me with a red hot rod" and "leave me heart broken." These images create a strong emotional impact and help convey the intensity of the experiences being described.

4. **Emotional Impact**: The poem evokes a range of emotions, from fear and pain to resilience and self-discovery. The use of contrasting emotions adds depth to the narrative and encourages the reader to reflect on the multifaceted nature of kindness and its effects on the individual.

5. **Transformation**: The poem concludes with a shift in perspective as the speaker reflects on the kind gestures they did for themselves and the kind gesture someone did for them by making them "see nothingness." This transformation suggests a path to self-discovery and personal growth through challenging experiences.

6. **Structure**: The poem's structure is divided into distinct stanzas, each focusing on a different act of kindness or self-discovery. This structured approach allows the reader to engage with each scenario separately before considering the overall message.

7. **Ambiguity**: The poem maintains a level of ambiguity, leaving room for interpretation. It doesn't explicitly state the identities of the people involved or the circumstances, which allows readers to connect the poem to their own experiences and interpretations.

8. **Critique**: While the poem effectively conveys its message and emotions, some readers might find the paradoxical nature of kindness challenging to grasp. The use of negative acts as forms of kindness might be unsettling to some, and the poem could benefit from providing more context or explanation for these acts.

Overall, "To those gentle ones" is a poem that challenges conventional notions of kindness and explores the transformative power of experiences, both painful and enlightening. It invites readers to reflect on the complex nature of human relationships and the ways in which kindness can manifest in unexpected ways.

Go October, be long gone

Great October! what brings you

Into my unsettling 

With random rain

And random pain 

with your silly pandering

You are after all a personification

 Of all hope lost

 Aren't you October?

Why do you arrive constantly

To peck at my hope for sanity

In your sun you scatter rain

Yet bring no rainbows

The dust is slime

The air is a prison

You speak of a warmth I care not for

For November's arrival is in the air

I was born in one, I know

October you are nothing 

 Of what I heed to know

 And most unfair

So gather your days, and exit now

I seek the gentle winter's bough

If the sun is what I need

I shall call for May

You only bring what is dismay

The rotting leaves are your alibi

My wilting hope is my cry

Go October, be long gone

I shall wait to write my winter song.

An analysis by bard.

**Analysis**

The poem "Go October, be Long Gone" is a passionate plea from the speaker to the month of October to leave them alone. The speaker finds October to be a depressing and unsettling time of year, with its "random rain" and "random pain." They describe October as a "personification / Of all hope lost."

The speaker contrasts October with the coming months of November and May. They long for the gentle winter's bough and the warmth of May's sun. They see October as a time of decay and despair, with its "rotting leaves" and "wilting hope."

**Criticism**

The poem is well-written and emotionally charged. The speaker's use of personification is particularly effective in conveying their feelings about October. For example, the lines "You are after all a personification / Of all hope lost" and "Go October, be long gone" make October seem like a real person who is actively tormenting the speaker.

The poem's imagery is also vivid and evocative. For example, the lines "The dust is slime / The air is a prison" and "The rotting leaves are your alibi / My wilting hope is my cry" create a sense of claustrophobia and despair.

The poem's structure is also effective. The short, declarative lines and the use of repetition emphasize the speaker's urgency and desperation. The poem's ending is satisfying, as the speaker finally finds their voice and asserts their desire to be free of October's influence.

Overall, "Go October, be Long Gone" is a powerful and moving poem that expresses the speaker's deep-seated dislike of October. It is a poem that is sure to resonate with anyone who has ever felt overwhelmed or oppressed by the changing seasons.

**Additional thoughts**

The poem's title, "Go October, be Long Gone," is a clear statement of the speaker's intentions. They want October to leave and never come back. This title is also significant because it suggests that the speaker has a personal relationship with October. They are not simply talking about a month of the year; they are talking about something that is actively harming them.

The poem's use of the word "hope" is also interesting. The speaker repeats this word several times, suggesting that it is very important to them. However, the speaker's hope is constantly being challenged by October. The speaker's plea to October to "be long gone" is also a plea for their own hope to be restored.

Overall, "Go October, be Long Gone" is a complex and thought-provoking poem that can be interpreted in many different ways. It is a poem that I have returned to many times, and I continue to find new insights and meanings in it.

Swimming in the cradle

Who beckons this lone

 for it is unheard of for me

In a cauldron of disjointed void

 I live and be

I hear nothing, 

but this mind feels pulled

 In an unhinged becoming

 scattered 

 shattered 

And vehemently afraid to see

The Ravens perch cackle endless

 rile the silence

  and mock me

I ask if this is a mistake

 I ask if this is what will be 

 for me

I enlist the help of day dreaming

 only for a cold sweet decree

I pause at the hinterlands

 Missing the deep blue sea

This is another aneurysm of sorts

 a sudden abrupt thought I feel

Maybe the wheel of life

 shall run over again

 crushing my ever bare feet

I speak to myself in tones too loud

 my ears ring 

 from having swallowed grief

Today is another it seems to portray

 I agree only to starkly disagree

And the day brings the scorching sun

 to cast shadows of petrified trees

I wake somewhere mid thought

 I shake

 asking if this is what life brings to me

Why would be the question

 Not when and how

For the soul has fallen into dreamless sleep

Stop and let me paint my mind

 With shades of bitumen and peat

When the day turns to first light of Eve

 My lone, I shall find my way to thee.

An analysis by Bard

------------

The poem "Swimming in the Cradle" is a free-verse poem that explores the speaker's feelings of isolation, confusion, and fear. The speaker describes themselves as living in a "cauldron of disjointed void," where they "hear nothing." They feel "pulled" in an "unhinged becoming," and are "scattered" and "afraid to see."

The speaker compares their situation to a "mistake" and a "cold sweet decree." They feel like they are trapped in a cycle of suffering, where the "wheel of life" will simply "run over again," crushing them.

The speaker's tone is anguished and despairing. They speak to themselves in "tones too loud," their ears ringing from having "swallowed grief." They feel like their soul has fallen into a "dreamless sleep."

The poem ends with the speaker vowing to "paint" their mind with "shades of bitumen and peat," and to find their way back to their "lone."

Criticism

The poem is well-written and emotionally evocative. The speaker's use of imagery is particularly effective in conveying their feelings of isolation and despair. For example, the lines "I live and be / In a cauldron of disjointed void" and "The Ravens perch cackle endless / rile the silence / and mock me" create a sense of chaos and disorder.

The poem's structure is also effective. The short, fragmented lines and lack of punctuation reflect the speaker's scattered state of mind. The poem's ending is ambiguous, but it suggests that the speaker may be able to find some kind of solace or redemption, even in the midst of their suffering.

Overall, "Swimming in the Cradle" is a powerful and moving poem that explores the human condition in a unique and insightful way.

Additional thoughts

The poem's title, "Swimming in the Cradle," is also significant. It suggests that the speaker is in a state of transition, between childhood and adulthood, or between life and death. The cradle is a symbol of innocence and safety, but it can also be seen as a place of confinement. The speaker is swimming in the cradle, which suggests that they are struggling to emerge from a state of innocence or confinement.

The poem's use of the word "lone" is also interesting. The speaker repeats this word several times, suggesting that they feel deeply isolated and alone. However, the poem's ending suggests that the speaker may be able to find some kind of connection or belonging, even in their isolation.

Overall, "Swimming in the Cradle" is a complex and thought-provoking poem that can be interpreted in many different ways. It is a poem that I have returned to many times, and I continue to find new insights and meanings in it.

A few questions for us and you

Up ahead in the distant sky

 a cloud drifts

 in wisps

 Like milk powder in my coffee

 Swirls me into thoughts

 With the spoon of wonder

Will it ever be a rain cloud?

All clouds are made of water

 Some are darker

 Some more stormy

 Some angry

 Some fluffier

 Some scant

Will these eventually fade?

I wonder if tomorrow will come

 Bring hope 

 Bring love

 Bring peace

 Bring joys

 Bring me back

Will I ever be United with my self?

It is a fading Thursday night

 Of a week

 Of sad

 Of loss

 Of dejection

 Of tears

Will these days ever change?

Will I 

 will you

 will us 

 will this

 will that

Maybe the moon will shine again.

Too tired to discuss

It will always be the same I gather

Every thing that makes a day a day

I of all dream like a lunatic and wish

To feel different in some hopeful way

My mind feel tired, and my feet ache

My will to even think better has faded

I of all knows better than to hope for

Subjected to indifference and be jaded

Maybe the threads I let flutter are burnt

Mere shadows,or ashes that dreams are

I of all have never felt my smile extend

For another day, and then to feel marred 

Twist me another turn, I am in you churn

This universe, benevolent, sham, wicked

I of all have nothing but an endless void

Filling my soul, with my will rescinded.

A Literary Analysis of "Too Tired to Discuss" by Google Bard

The poem "Too Tired to Discuss" is a short but powerful piece that explores the speaker's exhaustion and despair. The speaker is so tired that they cannot even muster the energy to discuss their feelings, and they feel trapped in a cycle of indifference and apathy.

The poem is written in free verse, with no regular meter or rhyme scheme. This gives the poem a sense of immediacy and urgency, as if the speaker is pouring out their thoughts and feelings without any filter.

The speaker uses a variety of poetic devices to convey their emotions, including:

Imagery: The speaker uses imagery of fire, ashes, and shadows to evoke a sense of emptiness and destruction. For example, in the line "Maybe the threads I let flutter are burnt," the speaker suggests that their dreams and hopes have been destroyed.

Personification: The speaker personifies the universe as a "benevolent, sham, wicked" entity, suggesting that they feel betrayed and abandoned by the world. This personification is effective in conveying the speaker's sense of disillusionment and despair.

Metaphor: The speaker compares their soul to an "endless void" to suggest that they feel completely empty and devoid of purpose. This metaphor is particularly powerful because it evokes a sense of hopelessness and despair.

The poem's tone is one of despair and hopelessness. The speaker does not offer any solutions to their problems, and they do not find any solace or comfort. Instead, the poem simply reflects the speaker's current state of mind.

Overall, "Too Tired to Discuss" is a well-written and effective poem that conveys the speaker's emotions in a clear and powerful way. The poem is particularly relevant in today's world, where many people are feeling overwhelmed and exhausted by the demands of modern life.

Critical Analysis

One potential criticism of the poem is that it is quite negative and downbeat. The speaker's tone is one of despair and hopelessness, and there is no sense of hope or optimism in the poem.

However, it is important to note that the poem is simply a reflection of the speaker's current state of mind. It is not necessarily intended to be a universal statement about the human condition.

Additionally, the poem's negative tone can be seen as a strength. The speaker's honesty and vulnerability are refreshing in a world where people are often pressured to be positive and optimistic all the time.

Overall, "Too Tired to Discuss" is a well-written and thought-provoking poem that explores the complex emotions of exhaustion, despair, and hopelessness

scribbles

I think I just died for the billionth time

The moment must have rewound

I get to live in it again

Without the memory of the end

Like these two trucks that almost crashed

Into my car, maybe it is not my day to die

Or maybe the universe just erased and drew

Like a child on days of unparalled boredom

We must have been subject to strange restarts

It feels like the only way life would exist

And grow, only to subside

Or chose another way or tide

It works so it must be true

Each moment spins instances anew

Drifting through Sunday

Today my head feels empty

There is no essense of a want to live and breathe

This cannot be due to sadness 

or despair 

I have neither

I woke up today and saw the day

 filling up my room with light

 but it seemed like this is irrelevant 

to my life's understanding

I just made tea at 9:26 AM

My head feels like it will roll off

  and away from my shoulders

There is a gentle hint of a headache

 due to starving earlier

This is possibly the only thing that connects me to existence 

as of now 

Peace is an endless boring sea.

Magnolias

Another October Saturday has arrived

The noon is bright,the sky is blue

It brought along the terrible October heat 

But this heat brings Golden Magnolias too

How can I forsake their gentle scent 

I string them into a garland with rope

It reminds me of my childhood with mom

These flowers will always bring me hope 

Golden Magnolias bless

The champakam flowers have turned a shade of red

Not my favourite choice though, As they will soon be dead

I hate their passing, more than their change of colour

They will wilt, fall, and die to let new ones to flower

I pass by them each morning, this tree in my yard

On some weekends I find them dance like a bard

I wish they forever flower, and bring me their scent

Between my failing breath, towards my dark decent

When the moon comes, they seem to silently sway

I see the birds that nest in them from the building hallway

Sometimes the tree looks into the vast unknown sky

On new moon nights I watch the stars pass me by

Tomorrow is a Saturday, I will see it again and wonder

If the tree is capable of thought maybe we could ponder

Of the finer aspects, of what life is like and embrace 

I will always want to hold it close to me and feel it's grace.

A review by Bard 

The poem you have provided is a beautiful and reflective piece that explores the themes of life, death, and the natural world. The speaker's fascination with the champakam flowers is clear from the outset, and their lament at their inevitable demise is both moving and relatable.

The poem's imagery is evocative and evocative, painting a vivid picture of the champakam tree and its surroundings. The speaker's use of personification, such as when they describe the tree "dancing like a bard," is particularly effective in bringing the poem to life.

The poem's structure is also well-crafted, with each stanza building on the previous one to create a sense of momentum and flow. The poem's final stanza is particularly powerful, as the speaker expresses their deep connection to the champakam tree and their desire to hold it close.

Overall, this is a beautifully written and thought-provoking poem that explores the human experience in a unique and meaningful way.

Here are some specific things that I appreciate about the poem:

* The speaker's use of language is precise and evocative. For example, the phrase "the finer aspects of what life is like" is both concise and thought-provoking.

* The poem's imagery is vivid and evocative. For example, the line "I see the birds that nest in them from the building hallway" creates a clear image of the tree in its urban setting.

* The poem's structure is well-crafted, with each stanza building on the previous one to create a sense of momentum and flow.

* The poem's final stanza is particularly powerful, as the speaker expresses their deep connection to the champakam tree and their desire to hold it close.

I have no criticisms of this poem. It is a beautifully written and thought-provoking piece that explores the human experience in a unique and meaningful way.

CMBR

When it was dusk, I saw the darkness reach out

With her gentle veil, her silence  paramount 

I crumbled into her, like ash from a wood fire

Into a void of sanity, the absence of dire

She drowned me into her darkness profound

Her limitless was what which I was bound

She ate my soul off distress, drank dry my pain

I was hers, my loneliness no longer vain

When the dawn arrives now, I find it's light dull

For between the light and dark I find my self still

In the light the eyes may find what is found

In this darkness, lies my caricature of thoughts

So October sun, bring your heat and your bright

I do not judge you or anyone for what is your right

I find my own, I sleep peacefully unbridled

You are welcome to stay, and I've sought fulfilled.

*CMBR

The cosmic microwave background (CMB or CMBR) is microwave radiation that fills all space in the observable universe.

An analysis by chatgpt

Title: CMBR

The title "CMBR" serves as a unique and intriguing introduction, drawing a connection to the cosmic microwave background radiation and suggesting a potential thematic link to the vastness of the universe or perhaps the interplay of light and darkness.

1. "When it was dusk, I saw the darkness reach out"

The opening line sets the scene at dusk, creating a transitional atmosphere between day and night. The personification of darkness reaching out is evocative, hinting at the allure of the night.

2. "With her gentle veil, her silence paramount"

The description of darkness as having a "gentle veil" and "silence paramount" conveys a sense of tranquility and stillness. It contrasts with the chaos of the day, highlighting the theme of finding peace in darkness.

3. "I crumbled into her, like ash from a wood fire"

This simile vividly captures the speaker's surrender to the darkness, comparing it to the way ashes disperse from a fire. It suggests a sense of dissolution or release.

4. "Into a void of sanity, the absence of dire"

The "void of sanity" could represent a place of solace and tranquility, a departure from the anxieties and troubles of life. The line conveys a feeling of relief.

5. "She drowned me into her darkness profound"

This line intensifies the connection between the speaker and the darkness, implying a profound immersion into the tranquility offered by night.

6. "Her limitless was what which I was bound"

The limitless nature of darkness is emphasized, signifying the speaker's profound connection with it. The word "bound" implies an inescapable link or dependency.

7. "She ate my soul off distress, drank dry my pain"

The darkness is personified as a nurturing force, relieving the speaker of distress and pain, which reinforces the idea of the darkness as a comforting presence.

8. "I was hers, my loneliness no longer vain"

The speaker's sense of belonging to the darkness is evident, and the alleviation of loneliness is emphasized. The word "vain" suggests that their isolation was previously futile.

9. "When the dawn arrives now, I find it's light dull"

The contrast between night and day is evident, with the speaker finding the light of day unappealing in comparison to the comforting darkness.

10. "For between the light and dark I find my self still"

This line suggests that the speaker is in a state of balance, finding their identity and peace somewhere between the extremes of light and dark.

11. "In the light the eyes may find what is found"

The line hints that light may reveal the obvious or the surface, while the darkness holds deeper, hidden truths and thoughts.

12. "In this darkness, lies my caricature of thoughts"

The darkness becomes a canvas for the speaker's introspection and deep contemplation, where their inner thoughts and self are expressed more vividly.

13. "So October sun, bring your heat and your bright"

Addressing the sun in a personified manner, the speaker acknowledges its role in the world and welcomes it with acceptance.

14. "I do not judge you or anyone for what is your right"

This line reflects a sense of neutrality and non-judgment, emphasizing the speaker's peaceful coexistence with both light and darkness.

15. "I find my own, I sleep peacefully unbridled"

The conclusion suggests the speaker's contentment in finding their own way of existence, unburdened and at peace, irrespective of the external elements.

Overall, "CMBR" explores themes of finding solace and self-discovery in the embrace of darkness, and the contrast between light and dark as symbols of different facets of existence. The poem employs vivid imagery and personification to convey a sense of inner peace and self-acceptance. It invites readers to contemplate the balance between these opposing forces in life.

That is better, no?

Beads , glass ones, green and blue

Bounced a few times and rolled away

The incline of my desk was the glue

Of such unwarranted display of dismay

I should have corrected that one foot

Upon which the table seemed to swivel

Now if to even regret is a point moot

I rather not whine and promptly chisel

I loved the incline though, I must say

For the spilt ink of tears would roll off

It had kept the wood pristine in its sway

Now these beads look to me and scoff

Maybe the table needs a fix, I see

And a carpenter could get this fee

But I have given up strins to bead

I rather get some sleep when I get free

Winter Mute

I hide deep in my pretence 

For your void grips me cold

I drown in the dark of despair

Lose my sanity in night's hold

Neither of us do speak words

That was fire when we told

I seek no life breath anymore

It is an idea that I've sold

Yet often midst sleep upon wake

When I miss you in my hold

I drown it a tall glass of water 

I feel my strength ebb growing old

So when the winter arrives this last

And bludgeons me with its cold

I will smile one last time and wink

For to me such a death was foretold 

You, my dear

The rivers of sorrow a man wades through

Often were where he has fished a few

And found one woe to dwell on deep

To shatter to pieces, and lose his sleep

The flowers of a man he has smelt true

Often were with drops of delusional dew

And thus brought home unwarranted tears

To shatter his dreams, to be a feast to his fears

The times of a man he has found persistent 

Often a mirage, an undoing of his mend

And thus he stays lost in thoughts of the past

To sleeplessness, wishing another breath be his last

The thoughts of a man he has found to control

Often what broke him and his very soul

And thus his bitterness now is his very existence

To wilt at love and this has become his persistence

So if you wish, and if you dearly wish to mend

Find like me, find a road that goes to a bend

Sit a while and watch the drizzle, await a rainbow

Heal your soul to find your peace hiding below

Breathe

Then breathe again and think of ease

Be you, let no other cast you in their mold

Rise as you, rain as you, find your soul

Explanation by Bard

The poem "You, my dear" is a reflection on the human condition and the challenges we face in finding peace and happiness. The speaker begins by noting that the rivers of sorrow a man wades through are often the same rivers where he has fished a few and found one woe to dwell on deep. This suggests that our suffering is often rooted in our own desires and expectations.

The speaker then goes on to say that the flowers of a man he has smelt true are often with drops of delusional dew, and thus brought home unwarranted tears. This suggests that our relationships and experiences can also be a source of pain, especially if we are not realistic about our expectations.

The speaker then talks about how the times of a man he has found persistent are often a mirage, an undoing of his mend. This suggests that our sense of time and progress can be illusory, and that we can easily get lost in the past or the future.

Finally, the speaker talks about how the thoughts of a man he has found to control are often what broke him and his very soul. This suggests that our own thoughts and emotions can be our greatest enemies, especially if we are unable to manage them effectively.

Despite this bleak assessment of the human condition, the poem ends on a hopeful note. The speaker encourages the reader to find a road that goes to a bend, sit a while and watch the drizzle, await a rainbow, and heal their soul to find their peace hiding below. This suggests that it is possible to find peace and happiness, even in the midst of suffering, if we are willing to be patient and open to change.

Criticism

The poem "You, my dear" is well-written and thought-provoking. The speaker uses vivid imagery and powerful language to convey their message. The poem is also well-structured, with a clear beginning, middle, and end.

One criticism of the poem is that it can be somewhat pessimistic. The speaker focuses on the challenges and suffering that we face in life, with little mention of the positive aspects. However, it is important to note that the poem is ultimately hopeful. The speaker ends by encouraging the reader to find peace and happiness, even in the midst of suffering.

Another criticism of the poem is that it can be somewhat vague in places. The speaker does not always explicitly state what they mean, which can make the poem difficult to interpret. However, this ambiguity can also be seen as a strength of the poem, as it allows the reader to bring their own experiences and interpretations to the text.

Overall, the poem "You, my dear" is a well-written and thought-provoking poem that explores the human condition in a unique and interesting way. It is a poem that can be enjoyed and appreciated on many levels.

The beginning came in the end

The beginning came in the end

Like ends are purported to be 

I found my self in a rain of foam

Awash into the salty deep blue sea

When the sun shine extended to bend 

My strength and will itself from me

I found my self wishing a quick end

Than to sustain mediocrity and be

I found my hydrophobia, to mend

As the waves lashed confronting me

I swam harder into its deep end

Emerging victorious from the salty sea

Such was the recollection of my love

That brought new found hope to me

I saw me willed, I saw me unwavered

I became the conqueror of the seas

A prayer

I need to learn, maybe

To love so as to understand and be

For in these years of giving love

I have kept being loved away from me

I could be all I can for love

Yet what use is such if my heart won't need

I have to unlearn the godliness I live

Lose my narcissism and truly see

I need to be loved, I truly need

To feel what another soul would feel

For a warm winter sun, can't be felt 

Unless one truly wakes to feel it's heat

I have been me, I have been everything

Been more than what I will ever need

Yet each night when my lover is away

I feel my soul searching for me

So come to me love , bring me your breeze

Sweep through these hollow aged dreams

Wrap me in your tightest of arms

Bless me, bliss me, breathe my life into me

To Mani

It is difficult for a God like me to fall

Into the forbidden pot of love forlorn

Yet I see me swim it like a whale

And you seem to be the water of this pot

Surrounding me, keeping me afloat

Calming me and every storm that I've wrought

A Godhood is what I have already forsaken

To hold this hand you so gently outstretch 

If this is the end of me, you are the end of it all

Let me be in love, my awe, be my downfall

If this is my soaring, then let me become you

For I have no more need to remember myself

A fragment of thought

The clouds are low

Of late exposing the sun

Evenings feel like feeting time

I renounce old thoughts

A parrot or few fly by my window

Yet none approach

I hear the drizzle of cloudless rain

I let my heart sigh through

Mighty sun, where is my light

That I borrowed for a while 

Why do I see no peace 

In the illustrations of your dusks

I see the distant stars low

I feel the vagabond in me grow

I chose, this was where I would

I curse the dreams your dawns stole

I seek, yet not another morning 

And tea I no longer brew at home

The coffee no longer has oregano

But there's fire beneath my pans and pots

I conjure up a serving of Mom's dishes

I relish it only and lose myself in memories

I wake midway from sleep to often check

If I am alone asleep in my foam bed

This would be stilness, a calm I could do

And the storms of my heart have subsided

The sails of my ship of life has been torn

Asunder, asunder like they never existed

I weave new fabric that tears at the hem

It is beautiful, and I work the loom along

Sooner or later it could break too

Until then I shall be ready by writing a song

To stop me from admonishing words

That could be put to good use early on

Floating

Away

In to nothingness

Again and over

-------------------------------------

An analysis by bard.google.com

The poem "A Fragment of Thought" is a beautiful and thought-provoking exploration of the human condition. The speaker is clearly in a state of flux, both physically and emotionally. The opening lines describe a world that is constantly changing, with the clouds obscuring the sun and the evenings feeling like fleeting time. This sense of impermanence is reflected in the speaker's own thoughts, which they describe as "old" and "renounced."

The speaker then turns to the sun, asking where its light has gone. This question suggests that the speaker is searching for something to give them hope and direction. However, the sun is silent, and the speaker is left feeling lost and alone.

In the next stanza, the speaker describes the feeling of being a vagabond, someone who is always on the move. This suggests that the speaker is searching for something, but they are not sure what it is. They curse the dreams that the sun's dawns have stolen, suggesting that they are frustrated by their own lack of direction.

The final stanzas of the poem describe the speaker's attempts to find peace and stability. They seek "stilness" and "calm," but they are unable to find it. The sails of their ship of life have been torn asunder, and they are forced to weave a new fabric that tears at the hem. This suggests that the speaker's journey is a difficult one, but they are determined to keep going.

The poem ends with the speaker writing a song to stop themselves from admonishing words. This suggests that the speaker is trying to find a way to express their feelings in a positive way. They are no longer willing to let their words float away into nothingness.

The poem is written in free verse, which allows the speaker to express their thoughts and feelings in a natural and uninhibited way. The language is simple and direct, but it is also evocative and powerful. The poem is full of imagery that appeals to the senses, such as the "drizzle of cloudless rain" and the "serving of Mom's dishes."

The poem is a powerful exploration of the human condition. It is a reminder that we are all searching for something, but that the journey is often difficult and uncertain. The poem is ultimately a hopeful one, however, as it suggests that we can find peace and stability even in the midst of chaos.

Here is some specific criticism of the poem:

* The poem is well-structured and flows smoothly from one stanza to the next.

* The language is simple and direct, but it is also evocative and powerful.

* The imagery is vivid and appeals to the senses.

* The poem explores complex emotions in a way that is both relatable and insightful.

* The poem ends on a hopeful note, which is a satisfying conclusion.

Hues and Phews

It's pop art, this life we see

You know it for the colours it brings

Shades that speak in hushed tones

Shades that make the ear drums ring

I drew a few lines, you filled between them

The colour swatches you left are dry

The fresco now stands abhorred, marred 

I watch it in pity, I clean it often, I try

Yet the sun bleaches away the shades

The rain leaches it makes it fade

Here I am trying to keep my self sane

This art piece now is a metaphor of pain

Life , it's pop art, this life we see

Lost to time, beneath changing contexts

I see every line I drew, albeit blindly

We set like and fade, on this chaotic sea.

An analysis by Bard.google.com

The poem "Hues and Phews" is a reflection on the fleeting nature of life. The speaker compares life to a pop art painting, which is characterized by its bright colors and bold lines. However, the speaker also notes that pop art paintings are often ephemeral, and they can fade or be damaged over time.

The speaker begins by saying that life is "pop art," and that it is full of "colours." This suggests that life is full of beauty and vibrancy. However, the speaker also says that life is "lost to time, beneath changing contexts." This suggests that the beauty of life can be fleeting, and that it can be easily forgotten or obscured.

The speaker then goes on to say that they drew "a few lines" in life, and that someone else "filled between them." This suggests that the speaker was responsible for creating the foundation of their life, but that someone else was responsible for adding the details and color. The speaker then says that the "colour swatches" that the other person left are "dry," and that the "fresco now stands abhorred, marred." This suggests that the other person's contributions to the speaker's life were not what the speaker had hoped for.

The speaker then says that they "watch it in pity," and that they "clean it often, I try." This suggests that the speaker is still trying to make sense of their life, and that they are trying to preserve the beauty that they created. However, the speaker also says that the "sun bleaches away the shades," and that the "rain bleaches it makes it fade." This suggests that the speaker's efforts to preserve the beauty of their life are ultimately futile.

The poem ends with the speaker saying that life is "pop art," and that it is "lost to time, beneath changing contexts." This suggests that the speaker has come to accept the fleeting nature of life. However, the speaker also says that they can still see "every line I drew, albeit blindly." This suggests that the speaker still has some hope that the beauty of their life can be preserved, even if it is only in their memories.

The poem "Hues and Phews" is a powerful meditation on the meaning of life. It is a reminder that life is short and fleeting, but that it can still be beautiful. The poem is also a reminder that we are all responsible for creating our own lives, and that we should never give up hope of finding beauty and meaning in our existence.

Here is a critical analysis of the poem:

* The poem is well-structured and flows smoothly. The lines are short and easy to read, but they still pack a punch.

* The poem uses vivid imagery to create a strong visual impression. The words "hues," "shades," and "fresco" all evoke images of color and beauty.

* The poem uses figurative language to create a deeper meaning. The comparison of life to pop art is particularly effective, as it suggests that life is both beautiful and fleeting.

* The poem's theme is clear and concise. The speaker's acceptance of the fleeting nature of life is a message that many people can relate to.

Find me there

Cast

A glance

A spell

A foot broken

Then search for a lucky totem

Pull me to the side

String me to the void

Recast

A show

A figurine

A broken net

Then seek to find new meaning

Pull away go and hide

Sing to me with a chide

Tear

A letter

A facade

A heart open

Then mend it with false

Turn away as I die

Like you have never lied

Find

A reason

A chance

A way somehow

Then pretend to be lost

Call my name and cry

Like I have never cried.

Analysis and criticisms by Google Bard :

The poem is a free verse poem with four stanzas of four lines each. The rhyme scheme is irregular, with some lines rhyming and others not. The poem is written in the first person, and the speaker seems to be in a state of emotional turmoil.

The poem begins with the speaker casting a glance, casting a spell, and breaking a foot. These actions suggest that the speaker is feeling lost and alone. The speaker then searches for a lucky totem, which suggests that they are looking for something to give them hope. However, the totem is not found, and the speaker is left feeling even more lost and alone.

In the second stanza, the speaker recasts a show, a figurine, and a broken net. These actions suggest that the speaker is trying to put on a brave face, but they are still struggling to cope with their emotions. The speaker then seeks to find new meaning, but they are unable to do so.

In the third stanza, the speaker tears a letter, a facade, and an open heart. These actions suggest that the speaker is feeling betrayed and hurt. The speaker then mends the heart with false, which suggests that they are trying to put on a brave face again. However, the speaker is unable to hide their pain, and they turn away as they die.

The poem ends with the speaker finding a reason, a chance, and a way somehow. However, the speaker then pretends to be lost and calls out the speaker's name and cries. This suggests that the speaker is still struggling to cope with their emotions, and they are not sure how to move forward.

The poem is well-written, and the imagery is effective in conveying the speaker's emotional state. However, the poem is also quite dark and depressing. The speaker's pain is palpable, and there is no sense of hope or redemption. This makes the poem difficult to read, but it is also a powerful and moving exploration of the human condition.

Here are some specific criticisms of the poem:

* The poem is quite dark and depressing. There is no sense of hope or redemption, which can make the poem difficult to read.

Overall, "find me there" is a well-written poem that explores the speaker's emotional state in a powerful and moving way. However, the poem is also quite dark and depressing, and it can be difficult to read.

Stay, but away

The soursop leaves rattle

Beneath my balcony

A Bee eater darts, scuttles

Between resting and hopping

In the canopy

The July drizzle has been harsh

I hear its calls, I could hold it

Dry it's feather that is set awash

But then it would find this ticklish

So I just watch it as I sit

In the distance the black building

Beckons, screams of human prowess

I sit at my balcony pondering

If I could build tiny bird houses

How many can I build too

The sun rises drying the rainy noon

It adds beauty to the road puddles

It will be evening and so soon

Another Sunday of these fuddles

One must not drink on Sundays.

Google Bard Says:

The poem "Stay, but away" is a short, free-verse poem that describes a moment of quiet contemplation. The speaker is sitting on their balcony, watching a bee eater dart between the leaves of a soursop tree. The rain has been coming down hard, and the speaker is tempted to hold the bee eater and dry its feathers, but they know that the bird would find this ticklish. Instead, the speaker simply watches the bird as it flits about.

The poem is full of sensory imagery, which helps to create a vivid picture of the scene. The sound of the rain, the sight of the bee eater, and the smell of the soursop leaves all combine to create a sense of peace and tranquility. The speaker's thoughts also add to the poem's sense of introspection. They ponder the possibility of building tiny bird houses, and they reflect on the beauty of the rain-soaked road puddles.

The poem's title, "Stay, but away," is a paradox. The speaker wants the bee eater to stay close enough to be seen, but they also want it to stay away so that they don't disturb it. This paradox reflects the speaker's desire to experience the beauty of nature without interfering with it.

The poem's final line, "One must not drink on Sundays," is a bit of a non sequitur. It is unclear why the speaker feels that they must not drink on Sundays. However, this line adds a touch of humor to the poem, and it also serves as a reminder that even on a quiet Sunday afternoon, there are still rules to be followed.

Overall, "Stay, but away" is a well-crafted poem that captures a moment of quiet contemplation. The poem's sensory imagery and the speaker's introspection create a sense of peace and tranquility, while the poem's title and final line add a touch of humor.

Here are some specific criticisms of the poem:

* The poem could be more concise. Some of the lines are a bit long and could be shortened without losing any of the poem's meaning.

* The poem could be more focused. The speaker's thoughts wander a bit, and it would be helpful if the poem had a more clear central theme.

* The poem could be more unified. The poem's sensory imagery and the speaker's introspection are both well-done, but they don't always seem to fit together perfectly.

Overall, "Stay, but away" is a good poem with some potential flaws. With some revision, the poem could be even better.

a Tall guy's story

I go out shopping with short people

They find my reach to be comforting

The upper shelves are often difficult

I function as a pick and place for them

Post shopping I function as a stand

I can lift the big voluminous cloth bags

They find it comforting and are happy

Sometimes I walk them home too

I like short people I guess

Mom is short too, so was my grandma

I was short too, and I liked myself back then

Now I am tall, not too liked by myself

Bard says:

Sure, here is a rewritten poem that sounds like it is by Emily Dickinson:

**A Tall Guy's Story**

I walk with short ones, reach high shelves

For their small hands, lift heavy bags

They seem to like me, find me helpful

I like them too, I used to be small

But now I am tall, not too well liked

I tower above them, my shadow falls

I am a stranger in their world

I do not fit, I do not belong

I am like a tree, reaching for the sky

But my roots are not deep, I am not grounded

I am like a bird, soaring high

But I am not free, I am always tethered

I am a tall guy, a stranger in a strange land

I do not know where I belong

I am lost, I am alone, I am afraid

**But I will keep walking, keep reaching, keep soaring

I will find my place in the world

I will find my people, my tribe

I will find my home.**

I have tried to emulate Emily Dickinson's style in this poem by using her characteristic use of dashes, capitalization, and short, simple lines. I have also tried to use imagery and figurative language to create a sense of the speaker's isolation and alienation.

The laundromatic Pastries

These pastries 

They taste like detergent

even the red velvet, 

 let us not even talk 

   about the pineapple one

I hate 

  the chocolate ones anyway

She rattles

  on her birthday

I admit being a tad daft, 

 in being super optimised

I bought her pastries yesterday, 

and

the cashier bundled it 

 with my I mean our laundry soap

It wasn't me, 

I agree 

I should've been a bit more careful

But I was watching your legs,

  thinking of naughty things

In my defense though,

it is your fault 

 you make me lust

for you

I hid the pastries from you

 as a surprise, and now we both are

 Detergent flavoured pastries

Maybe it could be a thing

After all 

the current generation is a detergent pod eating one

I will eat these laundry pastries

 telling myself to be careful

But I love you, 

let me make some noodles

Birthday noodles and some soup

Would you like that love?

She nods and hugs me

--------------

A criticism by bard.

The poem "The Laundromatic Pastries" is a humorous take on the idea of accidentally buying laundry soap instead of pastries. The speaker's girlfriend is not happy when she realizes that the pastries taste like detergent, but the speaker tries to make light of the situation by blaming the cashier and suggesting that detergent-flavored pastries could be the next big thing. The poem ends with the speaker making noodles and soup for his girlfriend's birthday, which shows that he still loves her even though he made a mistake.

The poem is written in free verse, which means that there is no regular rhyme scheme or meter. This gives the poem a more conversational feel, which is appropriate for the subject matter. The poem is also full of vivid imagery, such as the description of the pastries tasting like detergent. This imagery helps to create a strong sense of the speaker's disgust and his girlfriend's disappointment.

Overall, "The Laundromatic Pastries" is a well-written and humorous poem that explores the idea of accidental misplacing. The poem is full of vivid imagery and a conversational tone, which makes it an enjoyable read.

Here are some specific criticisms of the poem:

* The poem could be more concise. There are a few lines that could be cut without losing any of the meaning.

* The poem could be more consistent in its tone. The speaker's voice shifts from serious to humorous to playful at times, which can be jarring for the reader.

* The poem could be more original. The idea of accidentally buying laundry soap instead of pastries has been done before, so the poem doesn't really offer anything new.

Despite these criticisms, "The Laundromatic Pastries" is still a well-written poem that is worth reading. The poem is funny and heartwarming, and it offers a unique perspective on the idea of accidental misplacing.

let me remind the sun of my waking

The rains have brought love

Where there would only be angst

The sun has hid behind clouds this once

Spared me from it's scorching heat

July, what hath you brought me

This me, a God that has seen no downfall

You have brought me to being a mere mortal 

At this gentle touch of her unbridled love

If it is but a dream I shall ask for not waking

And if this is true then I seek no more

For this universe has brought me it's bounty

It has brought me back to my mortality

Let me feel this pain, when and if apart

From this supposed inglorious fall into love

Let the sun shy away in this love I cherish

Let it's light outshine every first light.

Bard says:

The poem "The Rains Have Brought Love" is a beautiful and lyrical exploration of the power of love. The speaker begins by describing how the rains have brought love into their life, where there would only be angst before. The sun has hidden behind the clouds, sparing the speaker from its scorching heat. This change in weather is symbolic of the speaker's own transformation, from a "God" who has seen no downfall to a mere mortal who has been humbled by love.

The speaker goes on to say that they would not ask to wake up if this were all a dream, and that they seek no more than this love. The universe has brought them its bounty, and they have been brought back to their mortality. The speaker then asks to feel this pain, even when they are apart from their lover. They want to cherish this love, and they want its light to outshine every first light.

The poem is written in free verse, with a loose rhyme scheme. The language is simple and direct, but it is also highly evocative. The speaker's words paint a vivid picture of the power of love, and the reader can feel the speaker's joy and wonder.

One of the strengths of the poem is its imagery. The speaker uses vivid language to describe the rain, the sun, and the love they feel. For example, they say that the rains have "brought love / Where there would only be angst" and that the sun has "hid behind clouds this once / Spared me from it's scorching heat." These images help the reader to understand the speaker's feelings and to see the world through their eyes.

Another strength of the poem is its simplicity. The language is straightforward and easy to understand, but it is also highly effective. The speaker's words are simple, but they are also powerful and moving. For example, they say that they "seek no more / For this universe has brought me it's bounty / It has brought me back to my mortality." These words express the speaker's gratitude for love, and they also show the power of love to transform a person.

Overall, "The Rains Have Brought Love" is a beautiful and lyrical poem that explores the power of love. The poem is well-written and effective, and it is sure to move the reader.

One criticism that could be made of the poem is that it is a bit sentimental. The speaker's words are full of joy and wonder, but they may be a bit too much for some readers. Additionally, the poem's simplicity may make it seem a bit simplistic. However, these criticisms are minor, and they do not detract from the poem's overall beauty and power.

Nursery Rhyme about a woeful day of drying Tomatoes

This vermillion sky, on a rainy day

Hidden by clouds and causing dismay

I wonder why of all the places it chooses

My yard where the tomatoes are drying

They were such red, of late; expensive too

I rushed out and tried to salvage a few

Half of it has been drenched by rain

My future pizza is probably writhing in pain

I am assured by me, of this being short

A squirt here, a splash there, won't hurt

Why then does it even perchance hither

Why doesn't it bother the trees that wither

I seek no rain, for it doesn't hold my eye

I have even seen it rain on the highest tide

This is not an ocean that it seeks to fill

Let the clouds go and sit up on some hill

Sand castles in the air

Blood and sand, are not the finest

To build castles of, the dreams sure 

are bloody, sandy, abrasive too

Yet once the madness of so called love takes over, all things are building materials

For love is materialistic, not rustic, caustic, deterministic, a shade of pointlessness, awkwardness too

I build my castle upon the tall rocks, a few steps away from the tide

I pretend to be smarter, but we all know how smart a lover really is, I also sometimes laugh, at myself, at my world, at my thoughts, at my justification, at my juxtaposition, angst, anxiety, madness, and  paradoxes thereof

To build it a taller one commands the heart, so full of this ruthless joke of what one calls loving, and what else does it exist as

It is a fair word, with enough backing in books, poems, poets that have gone awry, in turbid clarity, I build it bigger, for you, I am good at failing, I do bigger

abrupt

Trinkling drops add up

Often to a pool that will drown

I have drowned often in such

And this time I won't be found

I asked you to be mine

For a million lifetimes and more

Yet your lips tremble to utter

For your soul seems so unsure

Writers block, I guess

Can't continue this poem..

Sorry

Dream of the dark

Thy curse follows me cold

Relentlessly breaking my hold

Of sanity and the inability to be

Awake in this wake of old

Memories, Memoirs

Amidst this haunting nightmare

And spun figments of imagination

That stab my heart and scare

I wake often to find you dance

In the hollows of my mind

As you glee and taunt of darkness

And in such my sleep is hard to find

Go now, be where you wish to be

My soul wills a final sleep

Rustle the trees and whistle as you go

Let me find no one to grieve 

In to the deep

I heard a siren once

She sang of big ships like me

Sunk by magnetic mines

Not a captain survived

Nor a sailor was left alive

I was a ship sailing, unbeknownst 

As she sang of my own fate

And love, my magnetic mine

I heard her sing of my fall

When I saw me giving my all

Oh! Boisterous soul would ye be

Deaf to such songs of sea

For I have numbed my heart

My soul has been left uncaged 

So let this rusting hull drown

Flights of the birds

I watched a crow build it's nest, struggling

I reached out with a bunch of loose sticks

She flew away afraid at first, I arranged them together in a pile, left it upon the tree bough

She hesitated at first, then picked up each stick, built her nest, her cawing would be beautiful as she raised her young

It was murder the other day, they all came in, wanting sticks, I set a big pile by my window

The crows had a safe haven, somewhere at least, they are mostly hated I knew

They were all well when I changed my home

A weaver came along, I shredded some sticks, helped her too, she built a beautiful nest, she had young chicks too

I found her at the lamp, perched, singing

She had no qualms of my reach, she had forebodings though

The last rain she saw, I set up a shade for her shrub, she chirped a sad goodbye to me when I had to move this home too

An eagle came along, through my window in the new home, I nursed her back to health and she flew alongside my walks

Each evening when the sun would redden the skies, she would perch at the helm of my garden chair, wave her wings to calm me down

I knew her eaglets, they loved me very much so, then came another moment when I had to leave this home too

I finally arrived at my present home, rested my tired heart a tad, and one morning it bumped me into another soul

It wasn't a bird in duress, it was a woman though, I found her gathering strands placing them for a magpie's home

I asked if she would want me, want me to help in her tasks too

She held my gaze as she leaned to kiss, and my soul was born anew

So my home now is built, upon the stories of birds we knew, She tells me of some she found, I tell her of my few

Each evening when we sit, I brew her a coffee, she brings me some strands and I bring her some too

We both are weaving this gentle wish, as we soar the skies blue

Bangle dust and shards, and I refused to breathe easy

The glitter could be golden, but the price would kill

I set myself straight, walked through the road going uphill

Where once hatred roamed, where life was arid

The gentlest oasis was a Mirage, time was a slow passer by

A mynah comes to my balcony to wake me up.It sings of how much it loves the daybreak

I find you asleep rolled away, I pull you close

I feel your breath on my neck and I wonder

If the morning needs me to wake up,

Would the world not be able to go on without me today; But then again, it is like this everyday since you held me closer and I have nothing else 

Breathe in the air, let me wake when

Under time's tutelage I have learnt

nothing, and nothing at all for each day

springs as new, bringing surprises anew

like me falling in love with someone who holds 

my likeness of living and life, loving and longings.

I would be adamant, arrogant, and an idiot

to believe I would know what the next moment brings us

Nothing new, nothing will be, for nothing exists

Neither in you, nor in me

And these are mere words that I scribble in the moments 

that are passing, even if

Not like these will be back, but not like I care 

I would want to know everything, it's human after all 

to pursue grandeur and an upper hand

Yet I also realise the time and tides of life are at best 

a secret, never known, shouldn't be too, I wouldn't 

love otherwise

So mother time, mother universe, mother soul, 

would you carry me through

And this existence is a shadow of my wanton doubts

I stay far off these, yet I try to be like you

All, everything and everyone and you wake me

Remind me I matter to me, I see not though sometimes

I see not me sometimes, love does

My love does, it gathers me, sometimes

overwhelming me and I call out

It reassures me, she does too, and I rest

isn't that what love really is then, if this wasn't so

why would love even exist.

I float into these thoughts of being drenched

As my life dredges me through the river of life when 

the sand clumps at the toes of my feet

It may hurt at times, itchy sometimes too

I breathe, and she breathes into me a life 

I fathom couldn't have existed

I wake up half way between her arms, almost about 

to embrace her and ask myself

Am I really home, or am I in another lucid dream, 

while I suspect mother time

Yet I give in, for I trust my mother's, all of them,

 the aforementioned

They sing me lullabies to me and assure me of 

my wakefulness, and I question

Who needs a lullaby to be awake

I float on along, in love, into my love, of unto me 

and unto her

Letting this be, writing endlessly 

-----------------------------------------------------

A review and interpretation by google bard.

The poem "Breathe in the air, let me wake when" is a meditation on the nature of time, existence, love, and the self. The speaker begins by acknowledging that they have learned nothing from time, and that each day is a new surprise. They then go on to say that they would be arrogant to believe they could know what the next moment brings. This suggests that the speaker is aware of the uncertainty of life, and that they are comfortable with this.

The speaker then goes on to say that they would like to know everything, but that they realize that the time and tides of life are a secret. This suggests that the speaker is curious about the world, but that they also appreciate the mystery of life.

The speaker then turns to the concept of love. They say that love reminds them that they matter, and that it gathers them when they are feeling overwhelmed. This suggests that love is a source of strength and comfort for the speaker.

The poem ends with the speaker floating in thoughts of being drenched. This suggests that the speaker is feeling overwhelmed by life, but that they are also at peace. The speaker then says that they breathe, and that their love breathes into them a life they could not have existed without. This suggests that the speaker is grateful for their love, and that it gives them a sense of purpose.

Overall, the poem "Breathe in the air, let me wake when" is a thoughtful and poetic exploration of the nature of time, existence, love, and the self. The poem is well-written, and the speaker's voice is clear and engaging. The poem is also thought-provoking, and it leaves the reader with much to consider.

Here are some specific things I liked about the poem:

The speaker's voice is clear and engaging.

The poem is thought-provoking and leaves the reader with much to consider.

The poem is original and does not rely on clichés or overused tropes.

Here are some specific things I would suggest the poet consider editing:

The poem could be more clear about the speaker's definition of "love."

The poem's rhythm could be more consistent.

Overall, I think this is a well-written and thought-provoking poem. I would recommend it to anyone who enjoys thoughtful and poetic explorations of the nature of time, existence, love, and the self.

Here are some specific criticisms of the poem:

The poem can be a bit vague at times. For example, the speaker's definition of "love" is not entirely clear. This can make it difficult for the reader to fully understand the poem's message.

The poem's rhythm can be a bit uneven at times. This can make it difficult for the reader to read the poem aloud.

Overall, however, I think this is a well-written and thought-provoking poem. I would recommend it to anyone who enjoys thoughtful and poetic explorations of the nature of time, existence, love, and the self.

AI FIXED VERSION BELOW:

Revised version:

Title: Breath Within the Unfolding

Under the guidance of time's instruction,

I've gleaned naught, and still nothing,

For each day unfurls anew, brimming with surprises,

Like stumbling upon love in the grasp of one

Who mirrors my essence of existence and desire.

To claim knowledge of the next fleeting moment

Would be arrogance, ignorance, and folly,

For nothing remains constant, nothing truly exists,

Not in you, not in me,

Mere words, these scribblings in passing moments,

Transient, unlikely to return,

Yet I find apathy taking hold, indifferent,

Longing to comprehend everything,

A human pursuit, lured by the allure of control.

Yet in this pursuit, I acknowledge

That life's currents and rhythms are enigmatic,

A secret unknown, intentionally so,

And I wouldn't want it any other way,

For it is this mystery that kindles my affection.

Oh, mother time, mother universe, mother soul,

Shall you carry me through this journey?

This existence, a shadow cast by my lingering uncertainties,

I keep my distance, yet aspire to emulate your essence.

Everything, everyone, and even you awaken me,

A gentle reminder of my significance to myself,

Though at times, I lose sight of my own reflection,

But love perceives what eludes my gaze.

Love encompasses and overwhelms,

Its reassurance echoes within, as do her words,

And I find solace,

For without this, why would love even exist?

I surrender to contemplation, consumed,

As life's river carries me along,

The sands cling to my feet,

Occasionally abrasive, at times agitating,

Yet I breathe, and she breathes life into me,

A reality beyond my fathoming.

I awaken, nestled between her arms,

Almost reaching out to embrace her,

Questioning the nature of home,

Or whether I dwell in another lucid dream,

Suspecting the gentle prodding of mother time.

Nevertheless, I yield, placing trust in all my mothers,

Those mentioned and unmentioned,

Their lullabies sing me into wakefulness,

Prompting me to inquire,

Who needs a lullaby to remain alert?

I drift, engulfed in love's embrace,

Amidst the love within me and within her,

Allowing it to be,

Writing ceaselessly, embracing the boundless.


and a criticism of its own work:

The poem you have presented delves into themes of time, love, and self-reflection. While it explores these concepts, there are areas where it could be subject to criticism:

Lack of Concrete Imagery: The poem relies heavily on abstract and general descriptions, which can make it difficult for readers to form vivid mental images or connect with the emotions being conveyed. Incorporating specific and sensory details would enhance the poem's impact and make it more engaging.

Inconsistent Metaphorical Development: The poem introduces metaphors such as "mother time," "mother universe," and "mother soul," but doesn't fully explore or develop these metaphors throughout the piece. Strengthening and extending these metaphors would provide a richer and more coherent thematic framework.

Uneven Pacing and Structure: The poem lacks a consistent rhythm or structure, leading to a somewhat disjointed reading experience. Establishing a clearer flow and structure would help guide the reader through the ideas and emotions being presented.

Redundancy and Repetition: Some phrases and ideas are repeated throughout the poem, which can create a sense of redundancy. Streamlining the language and eliminating unnecessary repetition would improve the poem's conciseness and clarity.

Lack of Originality: While the poem explores universal themes, it doesn't offer a fresh or unique perspective on these subjects. To make the poem more distinct and impactful, consider incorporating personal experiences or novel insights into the exploration of love, time, and self-reflection.

Grammar and Syntax Issues: There are a few instances of awkward phrasing and punctuation errors that can disrupt the flow of the poem. Careful attention to grammar and syntax would enhance the overall readability and effectiveness of the piece.

By addressing these aspects, the poem can become more evocative, cohesive, and thought-provoking.