Tuesday 29 August 2023

A fragment of thought

The clouds are low
Of late exposing the sun
Evenings feel like feeting time
I renounce old thoughts
A parrot or few fly by my window
Yet none approach
I hear the drizzle of cloudless rain
I let my heart sigh through

Mighty sun, where is my light
That I borrowed for a while 
Why do I see no peace 
In the illustrations of your dusks
I see the distant stars low
I feel the vagabond in me grow
I chose, this was where I would
I curse the dreams your dawns stole

I seek, yet not another morning 
And tea I no longer brew at home
The coffee no longer has oregano
But there's fire beneath my pans and pots
I conjure up a serving of Mom's dishes
I relish it only and lose myself in memories
I wake midway from sleep to often check
If I am alone asleep in my foam bed

This would be stilness, a calm I could do
And the storms of my heart have subsided
The sails of my ship of life has been torn
Asunder, asunder like they never existed
I weave new fabric that tears at the hem
It is beautiful, and I work the loom along
Sooner or later it could break too
Until then I shall be ready by writing a song

To stop me from admonishing words
That could be put to good use early on

Floating

Away

In to nothingness

Again and over


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An analysis by bard.google.com


The poem "A Fragment of Thought" is a beautiful and thought-provoking exploration of the human condition. The speaker is clearly in a state of flux, both physically and emotionally. The opening lines describe a world that is constantly changing, with the clouds obscuring the sun and the evenings feeling like fleeting time. This sense of impermanence is reflected in the speaker's own thoughts, which they describe as "old" and "renounced."

The speaker then turns to the sun, asking where its light has gone. This question suggests that the speaker is searching for something to give them hope and direction. However, the sun is silent, and the speaker is left feeling lost and alone.

In the next stanza, the speaker describes the feeling of being a vagabond, someone who is always on the move. This suggests that the speaker is searching for something, but they are not sure what it is. They curse the dreams that the sun's dawns have stolen, suggesting that they are frustrated by their own lack of direction.

The final stanzas of the poem describe the speaker's attempts to find peace and stability. They seek "stilness" and "calm," but they are unable to find it. The sails of their ship of life have been torn asunder, and they are forced to weave a new fabric that tears at the hem. This suggests that the speaker's journey is a difficult one, but they are determined to keep going.

The poem ends with the speaker writing a song to stop themselves from admonishing words. This suggests that the speaker is trying to find a way to express their feelings in a positive way. They are no longer willing to let their words float away into nothingness.

The poem is written in free verse, which allows the speaker to express their thoughts and feelings in a natural and uninhibited way. The language is simple and direct, but it is also evocative and powerful. The poem is full of imagery that appeals to the senses, such as the "drizzle of cloudless rain" and the "serving of Mom's dishes."

The poem is a powerful exploration of the human condition. It is a reminder that we are all searching for something, but that the journey is often difficult and uncertain. The poem is ultimately a hopeful one, however, as it suggests that we can find peace and stability even in the midst of chaos.

Here is some specific criticism of the poem:

* The poem is well-structured and flows smoothly from one stanza to the next.
* The language is simple and direct, but it is also evocative and powerful.
* The imagery is vivid and appeals to the senses.
* The poem explores complex emotions in a way that is both relatable and insightful.
* The poem ends on a hopeful note, which is a satisfying conclusion.


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